I think we all can agree that this last presidential election was quite the roller coaster. It was exciting, stimulating, and oh so angering at times. Despite feeling like we were a part of some lame reality television show exposing our most embarrassing family dysfunctions and secrets, I don't think any of us ever thought it would actually continue. Then there it was, The apocalypse. I remember being at work that Tuesday evening of the election taking customer calls from all over the U.S. I was respectful and pleasant to all the Trump supporters calling in never the while thinking they would actually be the ones to pop open those bottles of bubbly. After my shift still hopeful i get home , turn on the television, and there it was. They announced Donald Trump as the new president. I sat there with my mouth wide open, tears streaming down my face, heart cracking and shattering to a million little pieces dropping into my sickened belly. Speechless.
Facebook friends had been slowly creeping out of the Trump supporting closet and some were LGBT! Sure he held a rainbow flag at one of his rallies and gave some sad lip service and awkwardly vomited out the letters LGBTQ, but really who believed or trusted any of it?
Then there were the christian friends beginning to post anti homosexual propaganda and hail Mike Pence as some holy man of God. Here we go again trying to merge church and state and dictate. Now we know this man is no friend of our LGBT family nor does he want us to have any normal decent human being rights. Yet some within our family and community are supporting him? Even some of our "allies". All the disgusting behavior we witnessed first hand of Trump, all the racism and negativity surrounding him, and all his cabinet picks really said a lot! I know I am not alone in feeling this was very reminiscent to what I remember of the whole Prop 8 debacle.
Everywhere you looked and mostly in Northern Fresno were those damn yellow Yes on 8 signs.
I remember feeling too scared to even have a rainbow sticker on my car during this time because who knew what would happen. Just like in these Trump days people back then were more than happy to jump on the hate bandwagon. Together they felt comfortable to display their ignorance, hate, and bigotry. We were dissected down to be only a representation of sex and ignored for the red beating hearts and souls we are deep down.
I remember driving in Atwater at the five corners seeing Yes on 8 protesters with their signs and immediately went to the store with my best friend to make our own. We went back to that corner this time on foot with No on 8 signs.
I will never forget the lady there that was against my rights looking at me slightly confused and delighted when I showed her nothing but respect and kindness in our conversation despite our obvious disagreement. I only hope that that moment made her think twice about how she judges and views us. Yes we were also met by trucks of men screaming at us calling us fags and dykes but guess what? We were also met by others who were encouraged by just us two No on 8 girls in the midst of that Yes group who were empowered to make their own noise and signs as well.
Now we are able to be happily married and some of us sure jumped on it after this election. I married the love of my life and many others did too. Everywhere you looked many of the LGBT community were saying I do and it was no coincidence it was before this man got into the office officially.
I'll be completely honest and I know I'm not alone in this, I became quite depressed and really felt knocked down by this election, but it's time to get back up.
I want to say also that I in no way compare my pain and sorrows to those who paved the way and really truly fought the good fight. Those fighters and activists who with their blood sweat and tears made it even possible for any of us LGBT to have the rights we deserve.