It can be incredibly hard to make friends, whether you've just moved to a new city or you are just trying to widen your circle, it’s not easy to find people who you can relate to.

That’s why LGBT Fresno hosts various events throughout the year, including a game night every month for LGBT individuals and allies to come together, meet new people and make friends.

The board game night is a twice monthly event for people to have fun playing games and meeting other community members. There are handfuls of games for people to try and plenty of snacks and drinks to enjoy. Games such as Uno, Coup, and Spyfall are available, but there are plenty of other games. Tasty snacks such as cookies and chips are also available for everyone to enjoy. Whether you’re a board game lover or a casual player, there are fun games of different genres for everyone to enjoy.

On top of board games, occassional raffles are offered where anyone who comes is eligible to win prizes!

It can be intimidating to go to an event where everyone is a stranger, but as soon as you walk in through the door, Kevin greets you with friendly smile and is eager to help welcmoe you. Others welcome everybody with open arms, and pull a seat for you to jump right in. They walk you through the game, if you have never played, and happily explain the rules.

Hosted on the first Wednesday of every month: Fig Garden Regional Library from 6pm to 8:30pm.
Hosted on the third Thursday of every month: Fresno Spectrum Center from 6pm to 9pm.

You can expect to play more fun games and see the same friendly faces. Won't YOU join us?

Read more: LGBT Board Game Night

We'd like to send our heartfelt thanks to everyone who has joined us at events throughout 2019.
This fabulous group of folks joined us at our free Holiday Dinner Party this month.

Won't you join us at our upcoming events?

Thanks to those who have supported us over the year, we were able to "adopt" two families this holiday.

Thank you and please consider joining us as we begin 2020!

#GivingTuesday is Tuesday, Dec. 3! Can you help LGBT Fresno meet its goal of raising $1,500? It will help pay for support and social services, referral services, events and more that are desperately needed for the most vulnerable LGBT+ community in the Central Valley. Each year we help to fight oppression and lift community members out of social isolation. On Tuesday, Dec. 3, Facebook will match all #GivingTuesday donations you receive, doubling your efforts! Ask your Facebook friends to help you raise a relatively small amount, such as $200; if many of our supporters start Facebook fundraisers, we will reach our goal!

Thank you!

https://www.facebook.com/fund/LGBTFresno/

Join us for a fun filled evening of food, friends and games!

This is a no cost event to provide a safe and supportative place for our LGBT+ community to be together and celebrate with friends.

Wednesday, December 18, 2019 from 5:30 PM – 8:30 PM

Yosemite Falls Cafe
4020 N Cedar Ave
Fresno, California 93726

Dinner and non alcoholic drink provided.
Please bring a wrapped gift for our white elephant gift exchange.

Our friends from Fresno Spectrum Center's Drag Bingo will be calling bingo games! No cost to play.

Reservation is required.

Tuesday, December 3rd : Starbucks in Fig Garden
(704 W Shaw Ave, Fresno, CA 93704) at 5:30pm, begin walk at 6pm.

Come enjoy the Holiday season with your fellow LGBTQA+ members. As a group we will walk the lane and wear Santa hats. Come early so you don't miss out. We will meet at Starbucks in Fig Garden (704 W Shaw Ave, Fresno, CA 93704) at 5:30pm. Look for Sal, holding a "LGBT Community Network" sign! We'll leave and walk across to start at 6pm when the lights turn on each night. We might walk half or whole...the goal is whole. Walk nights happen rain or shine so mark your calendars!

The walk is free but, donations are welcomed and can be made on the walk to Christmas Tree Lane.

Check out www.christmastreelane.com for more information.

For some people, it is hard to reach out for help even when they desperately need it. Fortunately, there will always be people and organizations waiting to help no matter what. An example of that is Jennifer Cruz and the organization she manages.

The Fresno EOC Sanctuary LGBTQ Resource Center is a place for LGBTQ+ individuals and allies to hang out in a safe place, get much needed resources, and for groups to meet. Jennifer Cruz was hired to be the manager of the center and has worked hard to make it what it is today.

“The goal was to open a drop-in type space that would serve all ages of the LGBT community,” Cruz explains. “To provide a safe place for people to be, even like a hangout spot where someone could watch TV, or play games, or hang with friends but also be able to access a case manager.

We’ll be able to provide housing needs assessments; they can get a meal if they’re hungry or a cup of coffee. So, that we’re providing those basic needs before we’re asking what other services you want.”

Apart from these services, the center is also able to help to individuals with other needs by directing them to the appropriate resources. Whether it’s legal or mental help, the resource center can connect people with the assistance they need. The resource center also has space to hold group meetings, such as an LGBTQ+ AA meeting, or a support group for disabled LGBTQ+ individuals. They also host fun events on every third Friday of each month; last month they had a karaoke night where they had around 20 people singing and having fun.

Located on Fulton street, the center is relatively new, but they are already making an impact. Cruz estimates that around 20 people come to the resource center on a weekly basis. She also talked about wanting the center to grow and to be able to provide more services in the future, by getting more grants and by taking advantage of the space their building has.

From an in-house attorney to a massage therapist to even a cafe, Cruz wants to expand the center so it can have as much resources as possible. The resource center wants to do everything possible to help people. They even have a phone number located on their website where people can call or text to get resources if they don’t want to go directly to the center.

“We’re aware of the discrimination that happens,” Cruz says. “Fresno can be a scary place to be for some people. Especially depending on where they fall on that LGBT category. Safety first of course, and we want everyone to have the resources they need.”

Full video of Queer Out Awards, filmed by CMAC.

Those honored included: 

• Queer Hero of the Year: Marsha Conant
• Outstanding Queer Nonprofit Organization: Fresno Barrios Unidos
• Outstanding Queer Business: La Vogue Beauty Shoppe
• Queer Youth (Under 18): Tobias Stokes
• Queer Youth (18-24): Kiana Medina
• Contributor to Queer Life through Volunteerism: Zoyer Zyndel
• Inspirational Queer Activist Leader: Robin McGehee
• Ally of the Year: Jennifer Chou
• Lifetime Achievement Award: Peter Robertson

When news headlines are dominated by disasters and political turmoil; it’s easy to forget the good in the world. It’s even easy to overlook the good happening in our own community; good that community members Randall Velasco-Stoll and Leon Velasco-Stoll are doing.

Founders of the Fresno Spectrum Center, Randall and Leon are here to assist the LGBTQ+ community members and allies as well. They provide resources and a safe space for people to come hang out and meet other members of the community. They provide board games, video games, and books for people to enjoy. The center also provides space for groups to have meetings or trainings. They provide this service for free, but a donation is always appreciated but not necessary.

“We developed a relationship with a lot of other non-profits, and in some cases, have also helped them become more LGBT friendly and become allies,” Randy explains. “So, we can help refer people that may have services; from anything like domestic violence situations or they don’t have enough food in their refrigerator for their family. We can help provide resources and stuff for them to make connections so that they can fulfill those needs.”

Randall and Leon also founded the LGBT Pink Panthers Movement; an anti-bullying organization. Founded around 5 years ago, the Pink Panthers Movement would be the first step into creating the Spectrum Center.

Located near Princeton and Blackstone, the Fresno Spectrum Center was founded by Randall and Leon, but they had plenty of help along the way. One of the biggest contributors, was Leon’s mom.

“It started off as an idea and [Leon’s] mom saying, ‘yeah you guys need to do this,’” Randall explains. “’You need to develop this, Hun, I’m behind you to help you.’ So, that’s how the LGBT Pink Panther’s came about; she was actually on the first board and she was a really big supporter.”

“She kind of helped to bring about that idea through her knowledge and was able to pass that on to us. Plus, we were also able to contact some of our mentors, like my mentors in the community; Jeff Robinson, Peter Robinson.”

Although it was a long journey for the idea of the Spectrum Center to become a reality; they don’t plan on stopping anytime soon. They have plans for the future. They are looking to get a grant to fund their Arts and Crafts night, which is hosted on the first Friday of every month. They’re also looking to get a grant for their resource fair. In the future, they want to expand to be able to help more people and provide more services. The Spectrum Center is always looking to help people.

“We just want people to walk in and be like ‘Oh wow, this is going to be okay’, Randall says. “If they read anything or see anything on the bulletin board; they see things that are going to make them feel safer.”

Last month my husband Brian (Yes, his name is Brian also) and I celebrated our thirty-five-year anniversary. I truly can’t believe we’ve been together for thirty-five years! It seems as if it was just yesterday that we were teenagers, sitting on a rock by the river, getting to know one another.

It was the end of the summer, the year was 1984, and I had been secretly lusting over Brian all summer. At the time, I was openly gay, however Brian was a devout Christian and didn’t even know Gay was an acceptable possibility. He was curious and questioning his sexuality as he began hanging out with my group of colorful friends. Our summer social activity was to park along the riverbank at night and party. In the cool California air, for hours we laughed, drank, and played Truth or Dare, until like clockwork, at two a.m., the local sheriff drove out and cleared all the cars away.
The night of September 8, 1984, Brian and I had separated from the crowd and had wandered over to the rocks on the river’s edge. After hours of talking, I finally worked up the nerve to confess my feelings to him. He admitted he had the same feelings, but was unsure about if it was right to act on. That night, I asked him to take a chance, to take a leap of faith, to trust me I promised not to hurt him. He accepted what I asked of him, and that night, we had our first kiss.
For years, we debated whether our official anniversary would be September 8th, or since the clock had struck midnight, and ‘our date’ continued, would the date actually be September 9th.

Twenty-four years later, and after a ruling by the Supreme Court of California, affirming Marriage Equality, on September 9, 2009, while standing before God, our family, and our friends, we were legally married and made the 9th our official anniversary date.
When I first decided to write this month’s blog, I was thinking about how much has changed since that summer in 1984. I would have never foreseen that after a twenty-seven-year career in law enforcement, I would be writing romance novels about gay men.

Every day, I sit down at my computer and get to craft stories about the lives of people, fictional characters that will enter bookstores, libraries, and homes around the world. Although all of my characters are vastly different from one another, they each contain bits of my and my husband’s story within their character.
In Ancient House of Cards, it was our struggle with religion and our relationship with God that was an issue. Sad to say, but the ‘church’ failed Brian and I early on in life, and much of the pain we felt has been irreversible. Before Sunrise is a reflection of the demons within us, and our struggle to keep a lid on them. Life is hard and at times doesn’t seem fair, but you must continue to swim or you will drown. Come to the Oaks echoes our innocence, our belief that our love could transcend all obstacles.

Diego’s Secret is about trusting our hearts even if it meant losing your family. Brian’s family had a very hard time with him ‘Coming Out’ in the beginning. Their love for their son never wavered, and over time their relationship has healed and flourished.

I poured my heart into Escaping Camp Roosevelt. So much of that book were pages from my life. The feeling that you’re not good enough, failure, disappointment and trust, are all things I have struggled with, and to some degree, continue to struggle with.

So, as in life, my characters have to ask themselves, “Is love worth the risk?”. To know that in coming out, they could lose everything and that by choosing love, there is a real chance they could get hurt, have their hearts broken, and still be willing to take the risk. Is this not what we all may have to ask ourselves in this one life that we get?

Romance is about the heart fluttering and the feeling that you just might die if you have to spend a single moment away from the person you love. Now, I am not talking about the mushy stuff our mothers may have read, but real relationship issues, dealing with a moral dilemma that is often surrounded by dishonesty, hurt, risk, and most importantly, real love that makes the struggle worth it all in the end.

Writing romance is so much more than rescuing the damsel in distress, or a cheesy love scene. It is about life, and what we all want… to be loved and to be in love.

Warmly
Bryan T Clark

Social media. There are many forms of it such as Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, and many more, but they all have something in common and that is that they’re being frequently used by people of all ages in this day and age. Although this may sound normal, it’s actually very dangerous. Yes, there are many good benefits about social media, but the amount of cons about social media definitely outweigh the amount of pros. Here are some reasons as to why social media is actually bad rather than good.

Using too much social media could result in isolation. Various aspects of their off-line existence, such as their jobs, families, and health are neglected due to people becoming so reliant upon online social networking (Source 1, Paragraph 2). This proves that social media is negatively influencing people to not be aware of the important priorities that they have, but instead make them, in a way, abandon it. Rather than connect with people, opponents argue that social media actually tends to isolate those from others (Source 1, Paragraph 6). Those who are too dependent on social media should really refrain from using too much of it because you can find ways to connect with others without always using social media. Isolation is a very big and recurring result that often comes from using social media too much.

Cyberbullying also often occurs on social media. Negative information posted on the internet with the intentions to destroy someone and have the information spread quickly to hundreds of people is called online bullying or in other words cyberbullying (Source 1, Paragraph 19). To teens, this might be very common because bullies use social media as a platform to ruin someone’s reputation and/or decrease their self-esteem. Social networking systems, online chat rooms, or via email are where cyberbullying can usually take place (Source 1, Paragraph 20). All sorts of social media are ways where bullies and others can use it to their advantage and make others’ lives miserable. Social media are programs that can be beneficial to those with bad intentions.

When it comes to social media, there are many risks involving privacy. There are many agreements when it comes to social media exposing its users to certain risks involving privacy regardless of whether or not it isolates or connects those who use it (Source 1, Paragraph 7). Whatever social media may do, whether it be isolating or connecting others, the users must be extra careful about the information they display because it can be exposed. No matter how carefully you protect your private information about social media, distant friends can still access it (Source 1, Paragraph 9). This shows that you can’t rely on social media when it comes to the protection of your private information. The privacy protection that is supposedly guaranteed by the terms from social media has many risks to it.

It is true that social media is a good way of communicating with others, although there are many bad ideas about it. One cannot deny that it helps form relationships for many useful things whether it be for work or romantically. However, social media is really harmful both physically and mentally toward the user. Many people fear that teens that use too much technology would not be as smart as earlier generations and won’t know how to interact with others (Source 2, Paragraph 6). Therefore, social media is dangerous and should be used wisely.

People isolating themselves from others, cyberbullying, and risks involving privacy are all negative results of social media. Everything has its ups and downs and social media is no exception. The negative outcomes of social media are sure to exceed the many positive views about social media. Clearly, social media is harmful and should be handled with good and thoughtful supervision.